When you’ve lost all your pounds, it would be safe to assume that you’ve probably gained a greater sense of self, more confidence and a hot body to boot. Unfortunately, it’s not always that simple. Sometimes what’s left after you’ve diligently followed a weight loss program is the rest of you that’s waiting to be tended to – your mind and your soul. Congratulations, if you’ve exercised enough discipline to stick to a program and you kept it moving on your favorite cardio machine.
In my upcoming book, “Fit and Fab for Life,” I talk about the necessity of doing the inner work. You know the stuff nobody sees beneath the well-fitted clothes and the toned body? It’s crucial for you to take inventory of who you are and what’s going on inside of you. Be honest with yourself and tap into what might still be eating you long after you’ve fitted into your favorite pair of jeans. Depending on what those emotions are, one might be hard-pressed to ignore this step because it’s such a tedious process, dealing with your stuff.
I promise you the challenge is worthy of the reward, as you will ultimately become more free in your mind to be the best you from the inside out. Dig deep and face the good, the bad and the ugly. Doing the inner work is crucial to the maintenance phase of your weight loss journey. Not addressing unresolved issues and emotions could cause you to slip back into old habits that will pack the weight on again. Holding yourself up to your inner mirror and reflecting on what you see will help you uncover things about you that need to be tended to. Although this maybe an uncomfortable process, the great thing is you don’t have to do it alone.
Seeking outside help is a great way to embark on the next phase of your journey. So tend to the garden of your soul, clear out the weeds, so you can blossom into the fullness of your best self. Emotional eating is a very real condition. Identifying those emotions that plague us help us to become familiar with them and develop coping mechanisms that don’t involve overindulging with food. While embarking into the inner depths of yourself, remember to be gentle with yourself and love yourself no matter what – it’s the fit and fab way to live and be!
As we count down to the end of the year with Day 92, how will you free your mind today? What are going to let go of? Old ideas, old friends that are really frenemies in disguise. You choose.
A few days ago I received an email regarding a 100-day challenge where you maximize your goals until the end of 2011. In retrospect, this year has been interesting to say the least. Some of it has been a blur while other times have been crystal clear. One thing I’ve learned how to do more is trust my gut -honor my intuition. When something doesn’t feel right, it usually isn’t but we second guess ourselves until it becomes unavoidably clear that your inner knowing was guiding you correctly all along. I have learned how to relax more, love and be loved. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable is scary but the catch is you can’t really get to the good stuff until you let your guard down. Loving and being loved is easy. Back to the challenge, how are you going to finish out this year? I’ve recommitted myself to my goals and dreams, despite taking a detour or two and scraping my knee along the way. I’ve pulled back the “Dora the Explorer” band-aid and the scar has healed nicely while I’ve rediscovered parts of myself that require deeper exploration. This can be scary. But I’m allowing the trepidation to recede because doing so allows me to become more of who I am and that’s all ways a good thing.
I resist the need to belong to align myself to the wrong group of people. I say “No” or I change my mind. I’ve also learned to welcome the accumulated wisdom from my life years and it feels good to know when you know. This is something that can only be earned with the currency of time. Having experienced some train wreck situations more than I care to remember, I have become more adept at assessing the situation and politely saying, “No thank you, I’ll pass.” So as I count down to 2011, on day 93 I embrace who I am and the amount of growth I’m experiencing in this moment.
“Style is knowing who you are, what you want to say, and not giving a damn.” – Gore Vidal
The season of Fall is upon us as the days get shorter and the nights get longer. Leaves have already started to fall. What I love most about Fall besides apple cider and donuts is fashion. Yes, I love Summer for the easy sundresses, sandals, sunny days and breezy nights but Fall is when you really get to raise your style quotient and shop, shop, shop. Lately, I’ve noticed something about me when I do go shopping. I always navigate to the same departments whether it’s Macy’s, Lord and Taylor, Nordstrom’s, etc. I’m a girly girl and have always loved dressing up which meant skirts, not pants, dresses and suits along with heels. Oh yeah, give me accessories, accessories, accessories. I know nothing’s wrong with this but I’ve noticed that my wardrobe needs a shot in the arm, especially since I lost 60 lbs. Why? My lifestyle along with my body has changed just a tad. While my guy loves me in dresses, he also likes me to wear jeans and things that show off the fact that I work out. This has posed a bit of a problem because I was content occasionally wearing the one pair of jeans that fit me until we started dating. We had a very “nice” discussion about this and while he wasn’t asking me to abandon my beloved dresses, suits, etc., he was unknowingly challenging me to let my hair down a little. All too happy to help me get there, he politely took me to the only store that came to my mind – The Gap. I tried on several pair marching out to show him each pair until I got a “two-thumbs up.”
That was easy right? Yes and no. What it did was make me see that I had kind of gotten stuck in a style rut and needed to expand a little. This would bring on another challenge because now I scrutinize everything I try on with this two questions, “Doe this make me look fat?” and “Doe this make me look old?” Perhaps dating someone younger does this but nonetheless, I ask these two questions as I don’t want to look too old nor do I want to look like I’m trying to be 25 again, regardless of how young I look for my age. What I wore at 25 is not what I would wear now. I worked in an office during high school so I was always dressed up in school so that I could easily transition to my office job after school but I also wore the “Flashdance” off-the-shoulder sweatshirts anything that Lisa Bonet wore in “The Cosby Show.” So my style ran the gamut in those early years. As I get more into with myself, I’m allowing myself to evolve and I believe my style is evolving to compliment the different sides of me – from the ladylike dresses and suits to the jeans and things that show off my shape, according to my guy. And you know what? Letting my hair down and not taking fashion so seriously suits me just fine. Oh yeah, I’ll also be adding more casual pieces to my wardrobe that make me feel sexy and also get his “two-thumbs up.”